So, you think I am nuts?

Sunday, November 27, 2005

My 3 day absence

I am still here, do not panic. Very much alive and kicking.

Today, my baby turns 7. How time flies and to think of me, raising her up all these years by myself, with some help from my parents, of course, I think I really deserve a medal. She is my reward, in fact.

I had a little party for her and some of my childhood friends' children. Complicated? Well, I still keep in touch with my childhood friends and they have children of my baby's age and everyone knows everyone la. So, it was nice to bring them together again and let their kids mingle.

I made star -shaped tuna sandwiches, cupcakes with hundreds and thousands sprinkles, ice cream cone cakes with icing and smarties as decoration, some carrot cake and of course I got the birthday cake from the bakery. The cake was a Madagascar cake and weighed 2kg for a mere RM 50. Good deal or what? Afterall, all the kids care was the shape of the cake and not the taste. For your information, I got the cake from Bee's bakery.

That explains why I haven't been updating my blog. Friday was a hectic day too. Had to go to Petaling Street to get fresh flowers for my flower arrangement. Came back and did all the conditioning and the rest of the afternoon I had to prepare for the party and the flower arrangement. No, the flowers were not for the party la. I was helping my mom with an assignment. I did a center piece for the buffetline and some posies for the dining tables.

Yesterday, after the children's party, I came back to finish off with the final touches and by 5 pm we had to deliver the flowers to Banker's Club.

I have never been inside before so it was an opportunity to go see. I die die also wanted to go up and have a look. The place is cozy, more like being set in the olden days, I can't figure out the era but sort of in the 50's. Very cozy indeed, very professional. Business magazines laying even in the toilet. Mmm...I wonder if the magazines are for the reading pleasure while doing some depositing !

After all those jazz, I finally KOed ( knocked out) at 10pm last night and had the best sleep since....don't know when. Today, I am refreshed and ready to take action again.

Oh, I feel horrible because her father has forgotten to call and wish her. I feel guilty for taking him away from her. I heard from my aunt who babysat her while I was away in Bangkok that she secretly hunts for his pictures and said how she misses him. "Why doens't mummy forgive daddy?" I was only told of all these on Friday and I really do not know how to think or react. Eversince, I have reassured my baby that she is being loved very much and that if she has any problems, she has to talk to me and not keep in her heart.

Some people , believe me, have blamed me for my decision to call the marriage off. I have tolerated enough, which these people will never understand. Their harsh remarks on my divorce have led me to think I am guilty and I am to blame for all the unhappiness especially for my baby. But, to come to this decision is not easy. To be able to stand up and call it quits took courage. I had to weigh all the pros and cons but I thought it was worth it. Hence the decision to walk out.

Only last few days ago, after a year since my ordeal, I still hear people blaming me for the breakup and it is from people who have not have the taste of being married. To this people, these allegations only prove your childishness and it reflects on your personality. The chinese always say " if only you have experienced the needle prick, you will never know the pain."

When will they leave me alone?

I will let you know if her dad calls and wish her today. Till then....


  • At 3:46 PM, Blogger JoMel said…

    Let's hope that these people will never get pricked eh?

    Anyway, who died and made them God? I suggest you say this to whoever who has too much spare time to be judging you.

    Happy birthday to your baby. May her years ahead be filled with everything beautiful.

    And I hope her daddy calls her today. *Fingers and toes crossed*

  • At 6:24 PM, Blogger straymana said…

    Tell your dotter I wished her Happy Birthday.

    I am still in the battle against time in my office now. Drop by your blog to clear my tired mind for a bit. Looks like gonna have to burn midnight oil tonite. *sigh*

    *scramble back to the battle field*

  • At 7:23 PM, Blogger JoMel said…

    straymana, goodness, what kind of job are you holding have to burn midnight oil on a sunday!!??

    better change job, get a life, before it gets you man.

  • At 8:24 PM, Blogger straymana said…

    jomel: Thx for your concern, no worries this doesn't happen often. Only once in a blue moon ;-) Anyway, I don't really have much life outside of work :P

    This particular project is pretty crucial to us, if we don't grab it and bite the bullet now; don't know when it gonna comes again.

    Bersusah-susah dahulu, bersenang-senang kemudian *grin*.

  • At 11:21 PM, Blogger Siao Cha Bor said…

    aiyo, stray, you have a life la besides work...u still owe me drinking sessions la

    thanks jomel, you are always very supportive


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