So, you think I am nuts?

Wednesday, November 30, 2005

My one hour sipping tea like a Lady

Fuiyo, I tell you all ah, today is day I will not forget. Never in my life I dined like a lady. It all happened today, at a little cozy tucked-away teahouse, noo , nooo , teahouse sounds too common, more like a tea boutique , aaaah.., yaaaaa.. , yaaa.., sounds more poshy, at Plaza Damas , Hartamas, with a childhood friend of mine. The place is called Angelic Scones and Tea House. Wah say, it is a totally different kind of posh from the 5 star hotel posh. It is cozy, homely, private and damn poshy ( at least to me). Me kinda sakai la.

Frankly, we went there because of the ambience and oh yes, oh yes did we pay for the ambience. My friend and I are crazy about food and we love to go savour food. Psst ,pssst, luckily today I wore something presentable .

From the outside, the boutique looked like an English house. The minute we stepped in, we were greeted by a maiden dressed in floral print dress, apron, and a head dress ( cap, scarf, .....I don't know the exact word for it). Very impressive. The furnitures were uh, uh, uh, very uh exclusive looking. They should be exclusive to match the theme of the place. We were browsing through the menu and wham, slap , slap ,whoa, the pricing, whoa, you should see my eyes rolling. One pot of tea costs RM23.00 and a piece of scone costs RM6.00. The prices of the cakes were all above RM10.00 per piece. Nice and soothing music they play. Everything was soothing and relaxing.

Anyway, our motive was to taste the scones as we are scones freaks. After placing our orders with the lovely maiden, we scrutinised the place like a hawk or CCTV. When the tea came, we checked the back of the teacups and saucers( of course, discreetly). Fine friend was wondering if they buy insurance for each China. I forgot the name of the China but the only thing I can remember was "gold plated..something something." Better drink with care. I managed to scanned till even the legs of the furniture whereby all the legs wore "socks"...floral print. Its one of those covers for the legs whereby when you pull the chair, you won't scratch the floor and also cuts out the noise of chair friction with the wooden floor. Beautiful art pieces hanging on the wall for your scrutinising pleasure as well.

So, the tea came first. My friend had exotic tea infused in a glass pot. I had a house specialty. Came the scones served warm with butter, homemade strawberry jam and cream. Of course, they have an extensive variety of scones but because we were there at 11am, they only had plain scones and raisin scones . We still sapu the 2 scones anyway. And, we sipped the tea slowly as it cost us 23+23 = wah RM46. Haiyo, we had to savour the tea bit by bit. At that moment, I was very hungry because I did not have breakfast. My mind kept lingering to the mamak outside and yearned for my maggi mee goreng. That one hour there, dining in style were an experience but I thought to myself, luckily, it wasn't an 8 course dinner in style because I would have died la. Hard for me to behave for more than an hour. Sakai or not?

Back to the tea. We were given biscuits to complement our tea as well. Very nice. After the tea, we talked a little and upon seeing my tea is finished, the maiden served me a relaxing floral tea ( on the house). Finally for the bill....yes, the bill. Drums rolling.....drums rolling....drums rolling......RM64.00 for 2 pots of tea and 2 scones. Gulp...gulp saliva, cold sweat...wah, never in my life, such a big big girl have I spent so much for a tea and a scone.

It was truly an experience for me and I would strongly recommend those who can afford such luxury to tryout this place. Remember, you are paying for the ambience as well. The service, oh the service, I must say, excellent personal service. The maiden deserves a pat on her back. Oh my god, I even hawked on her slippers she was wearing. It was a floral, pink floral slippers to match with her floral dress. I was dying to ask if she was wearing a Laura Ashley dress. Oh, oh, I even looked and felt the table cloth to see if the material is also from Laura Ashley. After a brief discussion with sister hawk, we did not think it was .

The only drawback was the place is too small for bitching. So, ladies, if you just want to go have tea and talk about your latest boyfriend, posh trip to London, your latest Gucci bags and your Botox or facelift, a definite place to go to. Because the place only caters for about 4 -5 tables, I personally feel uneasy with the close proximity.

Overall view, a place well worth going to for experience sake . And thumbs up for the maiden.

Monday, November 28, 2005


Yes, my baby's father finally gave her a call at 9 pm last night to wish her happy birthday. She seemed happy and all it matters to me is to see her happy.


Today, is not a good day for me. I went to inquire about the bazaar lot in Plaza Mont Kiara . I was disappointed to know that they are all occupied till January. Looks like I was too late in implementing my job ( book a bazaar lot). Sigh, and I thought I could make it for the Christmas sale. Nevermind la, hope I am able to make it for the January slot.

Lelong lelong, mari mari........

Boycott TGIF

Yesterday was a big day for my child. She turned 7. We had a family gathering at TGIF, The Curve outlet. I made reservation days before and told them I would be celebrating her birthday there. I have dined at TGIF before and I know that should someone celebrate his birthday , TGIF would have their staffs sing and celebrate for the birthday boy or girl. That was why I chose this restaurant.

Upon entering the restaurant, I reminded them again that we were celebrating my child's birthday. Just wanted to make her happy and she sort of knew we had something planned for her there. We had our lunch and waited for the surprise from TGIF. I signalled the waiter that we were ready.

Much to our disappointment, we were slapped with a piece of chocolate cake with a candle for the birthday girl but no singing from the crew; no surprise at all for her. Out came the cake for her, without cutleries as well.

(Excuse me for my vulgarity now, I need to get this out of my system because I spent so much dining in TGIF and this is what shit I got from them).

Came the cake and the waiter told me "Sorry but we couldn't sing for you because we were short of staff." What the fuck was that all about? It was 2.30pm, and there were not many diners to attend to. I see the waiters around, chefs around and the host and hostesses around. What do you mean by shortage of staff? I have seen, during peak periods, when an outlet is really out of staff, the manager himself or herself comes to help. Where the heck is the manager? If the outlet is really out of staff, I think the manager should contribute to the operation.

I was truly , truly disappointed. The fact that I reminded them 3 times that we were celebrating a birthday there, and the fact that my child knew and were expecting the surprise and the fact that it was soo upsetting for the birthday girl, I only have one thing to say about TGIF, and that is, if you face a shortage of staff, do not do the birthday sing-along surprises anymore. It gives wrong impression and false hope. And the fact that we were slapped with the cake and a "sorry" is only going to tarnish your image .

Fine. No cutleries. I walked to the front and told the person in charge I do not use my hands to eat cakes. He came over, have a peek at our table and just ordered the waiter to get us some forks. All I can say is that the outlet is poorly managed.

Do not give false hope. Should see my child's face of disappointment. So, people, do not be fooled with the TGIF celebrating your birthday with you thingy. Read the fine lines , " Birthday song not included during off peak and during shortage of staffs."

There.... I an still very upset and all I can say is celebrate at your own risk at TGIF.

Please excuse me for my foul mouth but I just gotta say this to start my Monday right,




Sunday, November 27, 2005

My 3 day absence

I am still here, do not panic. Very much alive and kicking.

Today, my baby turns 7. How time flies and to think of me, raising her up all these years by myself, with some help from my parents, of course, I think I really deserve a medal. She is my reward, in fact.

I had a little party for her and some of my childhood friends' children. Complicated? Well, I still keep in touch with my childhood friends and they have children of my baby's age and everyone knows everyone la. So, it was nice to bring them together again and let their kids mingle.

I made star -shaped tuna sandwiches, cupcakes with hundreds and thousands sprinkles, ice cream cone cakes with icing and smarties as decoration, some carrot cake and of course I got the birthday cake from the bakery. The cake was a Madagascar cake and weighed 2kg for a mere RM 50. Good deal or what? Afterall, all the kids care was the shape of the cake and not the taste. For your information, I got the cake from Bee's bakery.

That explains why I haven't been updating my blog. Friday was a hectic day too. Had to go to Petaling Street to get fresh flowers for my flower arrangement. Came back and did all the conditioning and the rest of the afternoon I had to prepare for the party and the flower arrangement. No, the flowers were not for the party la. I was helping my mom with an assignment. I did a center piece for the buffetline and some posies for the dining tables.

Yesterday, after the children's party, I came back to finish off with the final touches and by 5 pm we had to deliver the flowers to Banker's Club.

I have never been inside before so it was an opportunity to go see. I die die also wanted to go up and have a look. The place is cozy, more like being set in the olden days, I can't figure out the era but sort of in the 50's. Very cozy indeed, very professional. Business magazines laying even in the toilet. Mmm...I wonder if the magazines are for the reading pleasure while doing some depositing !

After all those jazz, I finally KOed ( knocked out) at 10pm last night and had the best sleep since....don't know when. Today, I am refreshed and ready to take action again.

Oh, I feel horrible because her father has forgotten to call and wish her. I feel guilty for taking him away from her. I heard from my aunt who babysat her while I was away in Bangkok that she secretly hunts for his pictures and said how she misses him. "Why doens't mummy forgive daddy?" I was only told of all these on Friday and I really do not know how to think or react. Eversince, I have reassured my baby that she is being loved very much and that if she has any problems, she has to talk to me and not keep in her heart.

Some people , believe me, have blamed me for my decision to call the marriage off. I have tolerated enough, which these people will never understand. Their harsh remarks on my divorce have led me to think I am guilty and I am to blame for all the unhappiness especially for my baby. But, to come to this decision is not easy. To be able to stand up and call it quits took courage. I had to weigh all the pros and cons but I thought it was worth it. Hence the decision to walk out.

Only last few days ago, after a year since my ordeal, I still hear people blaming me for the breakup and it is from people who have not have the taste of being married. To this people, these allegations only prove your childishness and it reflects on your personality. The chinese always say " if only you have experienced the needle prick, you will never know the pain."

When will they leave me alone?

I will let you know if her dad calls and wish her today. Till then....

Wednesday, November 23, 2005

Me and my childhood friends

After my Penang trip, some how, I managed to see most of my childhood friends in these 2 days. It is rather spooky because it seems like life is ending for me and that the timing is made just right for me to meet up with all my friends before tragedy strikes. I even managed to contact those who live a few hundred kilometres away from me. So, if you do not hear from me for a period of time, look in the Orbituary. I always joke and tell my mom and my godmom what kind of ceremony I want. My hearse has got to be the Mercedes limousine. I have even taken my photo shot professionally in the studio because I want to die looking glamorous.

Okay, back to my meeting with my friends. Monday, I met up with a friend since secondary school. To me, she has all a woman ever wishes for; a husband who is so ever devoted to her, 2 loving children and of course money is not an issue to her. We were supposed to have a girl-talk lunch. We did not expect her husband to join us. Of course, I did not mind but it appeared that he wanted to know who she was hanging out with. I learnt that he is jealous of her male friends. He was thinking that she was lunching with a male companion. Before he arrived at the scene, she told me that he is so devoted to her that he does not have a life of his own. No male friends to talk to and no drinking friends to hang out with ( Ah Pek, bring him for an orr kao night la). She has come to a point where she is trying to bring him out socialising with her friends which I think it is a good start because I strongly feel that a wife should be acquainted with her husband's friends and vice versa. It is a healthy lifestyle to include wives and husbands in certain activities ( please ah, don't think dirty). This topic brings me to another friend of mine who is also a childhood friend.

This other childhood friend of mine is not so happy. She is trapped in her marriage. She has contemplated divorce many times and we ( me and another girlfriend)have stood by her, to support her in whatever her decision is. But because of her 2 children, she has stuck by her marriage. She has married to a man who did not care for her, who beats her up, who chases her out of their home and who does not earn a living. In short, he is a bum ! I really salute her for being able to stick through these ordeals. I even helped her sneak into her house while her husband was away to shift her things out of the house. Now, she has moved back with him. I totally respect her decision. Every person has his or her reason for the actions he or her makes. My divorce has thought me to be fair and not be judgemental. Anyway, today I met up with her and she told me her cart she is operating is facing a rental hike. She may have to stop her business soon ( this is her only source of income for the whole family). She told me business is so bad that sometimes she has to top up from her own pocket to pay for rental. I know she is not doing well at all but yet when I see her, she gives me encouragement in my work. She tells me her husband does not include her in his outings and she often does not know his click of friends. He would go home from his drinking session at the wee hours. Sigh !

Yet another friend of mine, also a childhood friend whom I met up with today, told me a very touching story. She met a lady, in her mid thirties, who once had everything going for her; a successful business, a fiancee, a successful career, expensive holiday trips and etc. All of a sudden, she was struck with arthritis which left her with mobile disability and loss of her career and business. Because of her condition, she told her fiance to leave her as she felt a burden to him. And yet, he stood by her and married her. He took care of her well being; he cleansher, cooks for her, does all the household chores and does the marketing for her. It really touches my heart to hear that true love still exist.

I wonder why in these 2 days, I am surrounded with stories that are so real and yet heartbreaking. Is there a hidden message waiting for me to decode?

My heart feels heavy. I feel very depressed and it is eating inside me. In fact, I feel so lousy that I actually have lost appetite. I don't know what to think; my mind is blank . Why so?

Sunday, November 20, 2005

My Retail Therapy in Bangkok

Been back from Bangkok for a week but I haven't got the time to blog my trip till now. Sorry for the delay but I haven't forgotten about what to write because I have jotted down the important points.

The plane ride was smooth. Got a taxi ticket from the booth at the Arrival Hall. It cost RM 70.00 from the airport to my hotel in town. At the taxi ticketing booth, I thought of picking a half day tour to the Grand Palace. My main aim to Bangkok is to shop and eat but to do just that is too gila. And I know people will be eager to know where I visited. So I thought taking a half day tour from my 4 day shopping spree is a good idea. I signed up with the taxi company and paid ONLY RM40.00 for 2 person plus an English guide with a driver. Not bad, not bad. The trip to the hotel was OK except for my irritating driver who kept on telling us he had no salary this month and he relied on commission. Yea, yea.. I got the hint. But NO, he still reminded us every now and then and I counted he had reminded us 4 times that he has no salary. Geeees, what a farter...damn annoying. So, I had to tip him la...kesian.

The hotel was great......twas called the Baiyoke Sky Hotel. It is located at Pratunam area where the retailers and wholesalers are. Mmm...double the fun ( shopping). After checking into the hotel and rested for a bit, we wasted no time and took action. Shop, shop a mad dog let loose. The rest is up to your imagination la. Night time we went to Suan Lum night bazaar where we shopped again. There were so many small stalls criss crossing each other and they are located in grids comprising of 4 sections ( north, south, east, west). It was like a maze but it was fun.

The next day was our outing to the Palace. Had our buffet breakfast at the 77th floor with an excellent view except that the air is always hazy and the view not thaat spectacular but to dine at such height was an experience. Food was good. Then off we waited for our "handsome guide" we ordered. So,so I went to powder my nose and put on some lipstick hoping a cute guide would accompany us for the morning tour. Alamak, what a disappointment, it was a lady pulak. Sigh ! Ok, nevermind. I was shocked to be greeted with volvo S60 ( old model) but in good condition..somemore polished leather seats. We did not have to lift a finger to open the doors to the car. All was done for us. I felt soo pampered and all for Rm40.00 for
2 . We had to pay Rm25 for entrance fee to the Palace. The guide did her job well and explained in detail. We took no photos, we asked no questions. We finished the Palace in 30 minutes. Bad, we were bad. The guide was shocked we finished the tour too soon. Then after she brought us to the souvenir shop selling rubys and sapphires. We had no choice but to go as she said it was company policy to bring the tourists to the designated souvenir shops. FInally, we ended our trip with them dropping us at the Erawan shrine where I made offering to the Four Faced Buddha. Lunch was at one of Bangkok's high end department store called Central at Chit Lom area. It was fantastic. Fresh flower arrangements at every corner of the store. I tell you all, in my 35 years of life, I have never seen anyone splurge money on flowers like Central Department Store. Everyone was taking photos of the flowers though there were signs saying no pictures allowed. ( I read in the Bangkok Post the next day to find out that HRH Princess Srirasmi was there a few days ago to view the newly renovated store ( 700million baht). I guess that explains the flower decos. Absolutely an eye opener for me. Lunch was great. The concept is like Marche whereby you are given a passport to get a stamp for each food u pick. Except that they have made it more upscale and they have brought the whole dining experience to a greater height. Wonderful experience for me. Did not intend to shop at department stores but the lingeries and bras had discounts so I hantam also la. Whack, whack whack...sapu all . Back to the hotel to put down the days shopping load then off to MBK ,a shopping complex with thousands of shops in it. Trust me, you have got to be damn FUCKING focus to shop in there. Damn chaotic but fun ! 2 hours but not enough. Dinner was at the foodcourt at the top floor. Excellent selection there. Ate kerabu and tomyam till my mouth was numb.

Sunday morning ! Up early because we had to go to Chatuchak Sunday Market for more cheap shopping. Arrived there at 8.30am. Some of the shops were still closed. Before long, we started to shop and couldn't stop as the things were reasonable and we were spoilt for choices. We only lasted for 2 hours there before our wallets were dry as ikan masin. The market has everything that you need la....its hard for me to explain as there was everything from A to Z. We took a cab back to the hotel as our shopping load was too much for our arms to bear. I bought a pair of shorts for Rm 19, straw handbag for RM30, silk lotus flowers for RM70, Tshirts for Rm15, snacks like ikan bilis with dried chili for RM 9, car refresher for RM 1 each and ......aiyo I lost track. Anyway, back to hotel and off toMBK again. It was my last night for madness shopping so I splurged. I pushed myself to the limit. It was like Olympics marathon. I bought and bought until I was so exhausted. To battle against the crowd of people was bad enough. 70% of Bangkok people like to shop there plus tourist as well. So, you can imagine how chaotic the place was. Heaps of fake goods, heaps of small boutiques selling clothes, bags, shoes, you name it, they've got it la. My trip ended early; 8 pm. My body could not take the madness anymore. We rested for a bit and took our last bit of recharged energy to the 88th floor of out hotel to see the night view at the Observation Deck. It was really breathtaking especially viewing the panoramic view outdoor. Yes. The deck was outdoor and the blow of the wind was a little scary. Back to the room for serious packing. I opened my extra bag that I brought and just packed and paced. I needed to see how much more space I have so that I could shop for more stuff at the last day. Not much space but enough for a party dress for my baby which I say.

My last day in Bangkok. Energy recharged buy pocket not recharge. Sigh. After breakfast, I headed to the shop to get the party dress plus party sandals plus gloves plus hair pins for
RM 80. At least, my baby would be happy to get her high heeled sandals. Wah, by this time, pocket very tight already. Luckily,I was warned by my friend that we need 500 baht for airport tax. Whilst in the airport, I still had some bahts left so I hantam for the very last hour. Managed to buy a cosmetic bag ! Yeh yeh yeh....but my aunt looked at me with disgust. Tsk tsk tsk....this is a shopping monster....a freak...a real siao cha bor.

There, I have completed my retail therapy in Bangkok and I shall make it a point to make this a yearly affair....wakkakakakakkaka.....just love it.

My Penang Trip

Had a call from Penang saying my grannie was not well. We all suspected that she was depressed but not too sure. Mom and dad were away, so I thought I take a drive back with baby to do some pre investigation first and report back to mom.

We had a leisurely drive along the North East Highway, stopping at a few places for coffee break. I am a person who never speeds. Never! With my baby in the car, I always drive with extra care. However, I was stopped at the speedtrap check point. Aiyo, do not tell me it would be my first speed summon. If I was given a summon for speeding, I would not be called Siao Cha Bor . I was asked for my IC and driving ID. The policeman looked at me and my carload of food. So, phai seh. Before he could even open his mouth , I told him, " Nenek sakit." Wah, I tembak him before he could even say a thing to me. Somemore I told him " Aiyo, saya takut, you tau tak, macam ini henti saya." Gila or not, I hantam the policeman before letting me go. Arrived at grannie's house at 4pm and she was so delighted to see us. I did not even sense anything amiss about her. We had dinner with my aunt and some of her friends at home. Yum! Homecooked nyonya dishes. Of course, some stout to go with our dinner and pulut rice ice cream potong to complete the meal ( KIng's Ice Cream has the nicest pulut hitam ice cream potong but beware of the santan, you cholesterol freaks!). Anyway, had a good laugh and chat with everyone.

Bed time was fun. Some of us slept on the floor as it was cooling. Grannie's house is an old wooden house. Penang is a very hot place plus grannie does not even have an AIR CON. We just had to take a cold bath before bed ( bad for foong sap but..) and concentrate on our sleep. Her house is not far from the beach so we had some cool sea breeze at night. My aunts and I talked about "women talk" ( you guess la, what is women's talk) and laughed till the whole row of houses shattered. We hope that the houses wouldn't tumble like domino effect. It was fun.

The next morning, grannie went to the doctor to get her full blood report. She had no serious aliments except for high uric acid which explains why she has pain in her legs. Otherwise , she is fine. Pheeeew! By the way, she is 82 years old. We suspected that loneliness is the cause of her being grumpy and depress. She is a person who keeps everything to herself. The doctor told her to scold if she has to. Let off steam and hantam if she has to. Do not keep everything cooped up inside. My aunt is seldom in the house with her because of her job. So grannie is left with the maid. Grannie acts like a kid when she wants attention and she tends to forget things easily. But those 3 days in Penang, I could see she was happy. She usually does not want to follow us to the kopi shops on our eating spree but this time she would follow us obediently.

Anyway, back to food. Kari mai fun, pasembur, mee goreng, mee rebus, kerabu beehoon, perut ikan ( authentic nyonya cuisine with shredded herbs and fish stomach..yeah, don't yuuuks, thai food for lunch, chee cheong fun with prawn paste ( penang style),kuihs, kuihs and more kuihs. My stomach only had 2 hours of rest before the next attack on food. And that was not all. We packed a car load of food back to KL. Kuihs la, pisang raja la ( we can't find nice pisang rajas in KL or maybe we did not look hard enough for it), sambal la ( yes, homemade ones), belacan la, salted fish la, some thai food stuff la, biscuits from Ghee Hiang Biscuit Shop la ( it is a MUST for us to bring back these biscuits as we were brought up eating them and we miss them very much) and...let me think..what else.........aiya, and so the list continues la.

When we go to Penang, it was also a car load of foodstuff from KL and vice versa. Wah, I can run a logistic business . Paid our respect in the oldest Kwan Yin temple. Our trip ended on Saturday with us leaving Penang after lunch at 1 pm. Had a smooth ride out of Penang but when we reached Butterworth, dark clouds were forming and rain fell. The rain fell heavier and heavier along the way. I have to admit I have not seen such rain along the highway in my 17 years of driving experience. The rain was blinding and I thought of stopping in Ipoh for the night. It was tooo risky to drive in such a weather. In such a freak weather, I cannot understand why some drivers still sped like hellriders. I kept in the safety left lane all the way through and my eyes were glued to the windscreen. But I must admit, there were certain areas like near Ipoh, Taiping and Gua Tempurung where they had the most spectacular scenery when there were mist after the rain, I stole some quick glances. It was like Guilin in China with the mist and the limestone mountains. Very breathtaking indeed!

My whole journey came to 7 hours ! Yes, 7 hours ! With the speed of an average of 60 - 80 km perhour, sure la 7 hours. I did not even take my eyes off the road. It was a dangerous drive back to KL and we were so glad to reach the first toll into KL. The massive jam towards the toll took us about 20 minutes in the queue. That was because drivers behind the queue could not see which lane they should "Q". The "Touch n Go" and "Tunai" and "Smart Tag" sign should be made bigger and in bold and placed above the roof of the toll booth so that cars way back at the queue could see and be in their respective lane before reaching the booth. Last night's jam was about 2 km stretch towards the tollbooth and it was all because the drivers could not be certain which lane was tunai, Tag and T n G. Sigh !

We arrived home almost 8 pm. What a drive ! But, it adds to my driving experience when I apply for my "Driver" position.

Wednesday, November 16, 2005


Yes, I am back from my retail therapy. "Shop till you drop" and this had happened to me. Indeed shop till I forgot who I am . It was heavenly. The eating was also sinful. Everyday "kerabu" this "kerabu" that........and of course the desserts were mostly made of coconut milk and knowing what it will do to my cholesterol, I still hantamed them guiltilly. My bag had a good extension and so did my waistline. I only got to know about it the last day that my jeans was soo tight but still I managed to squeeze in anyway. Chaaaam....damn chaaaam.

Besides the shopping, I did a tour on the Grand Palace with an English speaking guide. But still, my main priority was shopping. Shopped like a deprived dog let loose.

Now, I am compiling the daily journals for my trip. I hope to share my shopping experiences soon in the blog.

Thursday, November 10, 2005

Tough Competition

Had a mother to mother chat with my Standard One schoolmate weeks back. I was telling my friend that my baby's class needs helpers to help out in the class and there are some mothers who used this opportunity to "spy"on other classmates results.

I was surprised that her son's class was worse. There was this mother who asked her son to write down all his classmates' results so she can compare. Another mother would ask my friend's son for his Science test just right in front of his mother. I was also told that some mothers have asked the teachers at the school to give special coaching ( tuition) to their kids so that they can excel in their school tests. Afterall, those teachers from the school may have a fair idea of what the tests questions would be . However, all these have to be done quietly. They do not wish to disclose to other parents fearing that they may follow the footstep thus creating unwanted competition.

What the fart is this? Geeeeeeees......this is all happening in Standard One. Have we gone to this stage of competition? I must be still dreaming. In my days, we were still enjoying playing 5 stones and taking life easy and yet we produce good results.

What will our children turn out to be in this near future? I wonder !

Bury 6 Feet Under

I guess I have rested enough. Thought I should write before going off to Bangkok tomorrow morning. Maybe writing down will help me leave this heavy burden off my shoulders before indulging in feasting and shopping in Bangkok.

I think it all started when I saw this man, a father, taking care of his little baby. He was working on his laptop while his baby was sleeping soundly in the pram. It really touched my heart to see a caring and responsible father. Before I go any further, this is not intended to attack the male species nor intended to gain pity. This is how I feel or should I say, this is the feeling I have missed out since day one baby came to this world.

How I envy those women who have husbands helping willingly. If only I could have a little taste of a man helping out in the household chores and help shoulder the burden of raising a child. You see, my ex never lifted a finger to help me in the household chores. In the very beginning, I thought it was ok for me to deal with ALL household related chores. Once my baby started playgroup, I noticed fathers playing the role they should be playing and then only I realised that my tasks is lopsided. I was the father and mother ! I know it is not good to compare but I just cannot help myself. To just give you a taste of what a bummer he is, he would not answer the phone though sitting next to it. He expected me to come running all the way from the kitchen while in the midst of cooking to to pick up the call in the sitting room. This is only a glimpse of what I went through, HELL, when I was married to a bum.

Everytime when someone asks me about my divorce, the topic of maintenance and alimony ( $$$) pops up. People are just so curious about my financial status. I am not rich nor poor. I live day to day. So, when the question, "does he support you and your baby" pops up, I feel so ashamed to say "No, he doesn't." I know I should not feel bad but I do. Then these people will say, " But how can it be? That is his own flesh and blood." But what I said IS the truth. I do not get anything but I got everything. I can just tahan all the crap and all I want back is my baby. I can leave everything behind for my baby.

I miss being loved
I miss being cared by a man
To feel appreciated for all I have done for the family
From a missy to a devoted wife
I go down on my knees to make a spotlessly clean home
To cook, market,clean, wash
I try my best without a complaint
I cannot even imagine
Me, of all people
Could achieve such tasks
No matter how hard I try
This is what I get in return

Had coffee with a close girlfriend of mine. She said she still smells resentment, anger in me. Sure, I am angry. I am only human. It is easy to say "forgive and forget."

Some days I get by with a breeze, some days I have to drag myself through it. Hormonal or not, I blame myself for still not letting it go. Call me a big softie or a loser but I do miss being loved by a man. I do feel lonely at times despite having friends around.

Be it the third party or drifted apart excuse, I hope to put this behind once and for all. I need to bury the anger. I need to overcome the resentment. Enough is enough. Everytime when I start the nonsense, I think to myself, " There is the greatest outcome in the relationship and it was the making of my baby." If it was not for him, I wouldn't have gotten such a beautiful kid today.

Kleenex, please !

Wednesday, November 09, 2005

Burn Out

I am still around but haven't got anything juicy to write on. Well, actually I have one big topic to write but I do not know how to begin. Its been behind my head for a long time and I have been meaning to write it out. I shall take another few days to clear my head.

Tuesday, November 01, 2005

Fooled by Fools

Today was supposedly to be a big day. I was going to pay up for my trip to Bangkok. After much research few weeks back, I have decided to engage Asia Travel Mart for my trip. Despite being a young company, I trusted that they would deliver to my expectations.

I chose a Free and Easy to Bangkok. I booked the flight and hotel. Everything went smoothly.

Today , somehow, I just felt like paying for the trip and went to the kiosk ( yes, they operate in a kiosk and not a shoplot office) while on the way to do some of my cake deliveries.

I got the money ready. Just waiting to pay up. A very happy girl I was. My mood outbeat the gloomy weather anytime.

After hearing the tour consultant mumbling something unfavorable, the smiling muscles in my face frozed and inch by inch changed to a frown and finally to an angry face. I could just eat up the guy like Hannibal upon hearing that they could not get the hotel for me. My face was like Mount Pinatubo, my fangs ready to devour my victim like a tiger, my body stiffened up like a frozen Dacquiri and my tongue, oh boy, my tongue ready to fire missiles. Why ah? I tell you why. Asia Travel Mart sucks !

Firstly, they did not advice me to give a few hotel choices in case my first choice of hotel was fully occupied. Secondly, the travel consultant did not check the status of the hotel rooms and advice me earlier that due to the water festival, most of the rooms are over booked. Thirdly, I was very MAD that they took it for granted that I would take any hotels that they could shoved me in.

Upon hearing that my trip would not be as rosy as I have planned, my hopes were dashed. In fact, I had a feeling that they were just interested in selling me the airline tickets while "trying to look like they are booking the hotel room for me." They had a week to try getting a room for me but they said that they were still waiting for confirmation from Thailand. A week to get confirmation? Come not lie to me. And most certainly do not put the blame on the Water Festival that all the rooms are fully occupied. I was not bornt yesterday.

I asked for my deposit refund and they could only reimbursed me in 6 weeks time because it was a credit card payment. That I understand. But the supervisor whom I called to complain said that if I did not receive the reimbursement in 6 weeks time, I should go to the kiosk and enquire. Do not look for their accounts department. Whaaaaat? Do not push the responsiblity to the poor consultants. Their job is just to sell, sell and sell tickets.

Then I realised that this Travel Mart specialises in tickets and may not be experienced in handling traveling packages and most certainly do not have connections to hotel reservations. Why I dare say that ?

Because after such a big fuss, I was not contented with the answer. I went to Reliance Travel and enquire for the same tour, same flight , same hotel and same departure date. There and then I got a confirmation on flight and hotel bookings and I was told that there were still vacancies at my choice of hotel.

So, what have you got to explain to me, Asia Travel Mart?

Call me the last minute and tell me you have taken the trouble of relocating me to YOUR next favorable hotel because of full occupancy due to the festival? I REALLY DO NOT THINK SO.

Shame on you . You have acted on my behalf without notifying me. Do not take me as a fool and most certainly not take me as a blurr sotong. And the worst part was, the person who sold me the package did not even have the courtesy to say sorry and not even the supervisor apologised. I was appalled with the "tidak apa" attitude. These people are the frontliners. They represent the company.

Yes, they may have lost me as a customer but I certainly did not want to lose the chance of going for my trip. To them, losing a few hundred ringgit from me or any potential customers could be OK but I still need my vacation. And the clock is ticking. I only have those few dates available for my vacation. I needed to find an agent who could amend the mess.

I felt cheated . Cheated like a kid. Give me a candy to pacify me while "trying " to look busy with the booking? I really don't think so.

I had to rush to a more reliable travel agent and got Reliance to settle for me. They were resourceful, helpful and courteous. I got my bookings confirmed on the spot . All went well. All the more angry I was because Asia Travel Mart blamed on the festival for the full occupancy.

A word to the shameful agent:
Hey, do not lie or blame because the cat will eventually come out of the bag and that will tarnish your image. You are killing your own reputation. And you have done it on yourself today. Well, you most definitely will not have me as your customer again.

And by the way, your flight tickets are not as cheap.